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Throw in a big helping of Lorelai Gilmore, a dash of Monica Gellar and a sprinkle of Jenny Mellor. Stir in a couple of crushed parents and two dozen cracked members of the extended family. Liquidize a hug with a barista and some coffee beans (if you can't get a hug then a kiss, fist bump or pinky swear will do) and add to mixture. Leave this to boil on a high heat for 2 hours and 30 minutes. While waiting whip out your favourite Tolstoy, Suzanne Collins and John Green novels and finely chop. Pour in a gallon of hazelnut lattee and as you carefull blend the mixture add a few specks of glitter. Chuck in a camera (batteries optional) and the pieces of one jigsaw puzzle and an entire globe. Add the petals of three sunflowers and then carefully combine the mixtures and pour into a pair of boots. Bake for as long as it takes you to say the magic words, allow to cool and what do you get? Me.
Best served with a cheesecake and a smile.

So let me tell you how this little baby was born:

It takes two people to make a baby, and in my case those two people were me and my Head of Year from school. At the end of 5 years at school every student creates something called a 'slam' book. It's sort of like a year book, only unlike the official year book, it's more personal and unique because it's controlled and created by you and not by a comittee.

Anyway, fast forward 2 years back to the same school, only this time I'm here for the last time to collect my exam results. As expected I recieved straight A's, what was not expected was my reaction - I wasn't happy.

Now, ok, I was glad to have done really well and heck I worked my butt off for those grades, but it was then that I realised good grades were all I had to show for myself. I hadn't done anything. I'd spent my whole life working hard towards academic achievement that there was never time to achieve anything else in my life. Suddenly I felt so discontent. Outside the four walls of the school I had no idea who I was.

I'd always wanted to do other things but with parents with extremely unreasonable high expectations who didn't understand that there was more to life than school (and still don't), I felt I had to keep my own feelings under wrap in order to keep them happy.

Anyway, I went home that night and while I was sorting through all the school stuff I'd accumulated over the past 7 years, I came across the slam book. I read through some of the messages from my friends, classmates and teachers and then came across the final comment from my Head of Year. It read, ".... Be bold and courageous. When you look back in life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the things you did do." And that was it. That was all it took for the fire I had been trying to put out to burn fierce and bright.

I decided it was about time I stopped fighting my desires to do something more and actually just do it. I'm not sure what's out there for me, whether i'd regret disobeying my family's wishes and taking a leap in to the unknown. But I can't go back. I've already jumped. Who know's where I'll land? All I know is that I can't wait to find out.

So then I decided to start this blog. To document 'my journey in trying to find myself' or whatever you want to call it, so that no matter what happens or how it all pans out, atleast it happened. Atleast I was bold and courageous. Atleast I tried.

I'll have to warn you though - I have no filter. Atleast not on here I don't. This is the place where it all comes out, everything I'm doing, thinking and feeling. Sometimes I might not even make much sense or i'll ramble on about something stupid or be too ambiguious or both. I can't promise you're not going to hate me at times but join me on this 'journey' and I promise to love you forever.

- Love MRS

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A personal blog I started to document my life to my friend Q

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Latest Blog Posts

  • An Update
    on Apr 2, 2011
    Met up with Reggie yesterday and found out a mutual friends getting married. There must be something in the water.She had a lecture at the hospital I was volunteering in and so we decided to meet up for lunch. I had picked up my uniform a week earlie...
  • I Am Excited
    on Mar 21, 2011
    Dear Q,When I'm sad I bake. When I'm excited I clean.For the past couple of weeks I have been very, very excited. You should come see how spotless my house is right now, seriously.The dream has died but I have not. You know that saying about how when...
  • To Wear or Not to Wear
    on Mar 19, 2011
    I can't swim. Dizzy and I had 2 years worth of lessons at school and we were the only two in the class who never learned how to.We started off pretty easily. We had to do these exercises and races but with floats on. After a couple of weeks I thought...
  • Trip to Bangladesh Part 4
    on Mar 14, 2011
    Ok, so I'll be honest. The entire trip wasn't so bad. There were some good things that happened while I was there, but i'm afraid they were far outweighed by all the bad.I got to see both sets of grandparents again which was nice. I spent most of the...
  • Trip to Bangladesh Part 3
    on Mar 13, 2011
    Dear Q,While the situation with Matt alone wasn't enough for me to swear I'll never go back, there were a few other things that happened on the trip which collectively was enough. One day I had woken up pretty early and was just lying in bed. When I...
  • Trip to Bangladesh Part 2
    on Mar 12, 2011
    Dear Q,I've just found out Matt will be arriving on Monday to stay with us for a couple of years .... cue freak out!!! Well, actually I found out yesterday from my brother MD but I didn't know it was him. Having the biggest house of all our relatives...
  • Trip to Bangladesh Part 1
    on Mar 11, 2011
    The last time I went to Bangladesh I was 12. There was only 2 weeks of school left so my parents pulled me out early (so awesome! But then not so awesome because they wouldn't let me back in with my original class ... but then awesome again because I...
  • An Epiphany
    on Mar 10, 2011
    I had an epiphany a couple days ago. It's caused me to rethink and re-evaluate a lot of things in my life.I haven't had any trouble sleeping ever since. It feels good. No, not good, great!
  • Bidding Farewell
    on Mar 7, 2011
    Dear Q,We don't own a scale. So my dad borrowed one from our neighbour. He's leaving tonight and he's taking a lof stuff donated from other people to give to the poor. He tries to do this every year and on the years he can't he sends money instead.My...
  • Friends Reunited
    on Mar 4, 2011
    Dear Q,It was The Kiwi's birthday a few days ago so I wished him Happy Birthday. As his present I decided to befriend him on facebook. His name is a very generic name and about a thousand search results much have come up but there was one profile pic...
  • Walking Blind
    on Mar 1, 2011
    It's been a week since Reggie's announcements and the conversation still doesn't feel real. I haven't spoken to her since but she has texted me letting me know she's dropped bombshell no.1 (dropping out of uni) and bombshell no.2 (starting her own bu...
  • I Love the FRT's
    on Feb 26, 2011
    Dear Q,In the past 3 days I've had to attend 3 mini FRT's. The first at Lane's, then Nick's and then Sal's. Now usually I'm not such a big fan of the FRT's but strangely enough this time I actually enjoyed myself. Weird huh?In the past I would always...
  • Peri Peri Chicken with a Side of Shocking Announcements
    on Feb 21, 2011
    Dear Q,It had been ages since I last saw Reggie and after the whirlwind week I've had I really needed some one to talk to. So we met up today for lunch. Reggie is the one person I have always told everything. I have trouble opening up to people and p...
  • Leopards and Spots
    on Feb 10, 2011
    Dear Q,After my tuition with Lane was over we decided to pig out over tandoori chicken, chocolate muffins and smarties. One of the great things of tutoring her is that she loves to cook. Correction: she loves to cook for me. So far I've been the guin...
  • It Wasn't Just a Park
    on Feb 8, 2011
    Most of the parents I work for are really nice and supportive about their child's tutoring sessions. They take an interest, provide encouragement and give me cookies. I say most because sometimes they're like this:Mother: I know it's been a while sin...
  • Blind As a Bat
    on Feb 7, 2011
    When I was at school I used to look a little like Ugly Betty.Minus the blue braces (mine were silver) and the bangs.I hated wearing my glasses. It was bad enough having to wear braces, but to add glasses to the mix? I really didn't want to conform to...
  • J's Love Project
    on Feb 3, 2011
    One of my favourite all time blogs to read is Zebra Sounds. I stumbled across her piece 'Invisible' a few months ago and have been hooked ever since. J has now started something called 'J's Love Project' where the year of 2011 is a year of loving fea...
  • I'm No Rory
    on Feb 2, 2011
    Dear Q,Yesterday I was watching Gilmore Girls. It was the episode where Rory and Paris are supposed to deliver the Chilton Bicentennial speech, only Paris shows up looking a mess. Rather than delivering the speech she proceeds to rant about how hard...
  • on Feb 1, 2011
    Dear Q,It's been weeks and I still wake up exhausted. No matter how hard I try I can never fall asleep. I'm considering staying up all night and then all of the next day so by the next night i'll be extremely tired, but I doubt that'll even work. May...
  • Liar Liar
    on Jan 31, 2011
    Dear Q, Sal's old enough to make her own choices and take responsibility for her own actions. However destructive they may be. She's a compulsive liar and if there's anything I've learnt these past few weeks it's that no matter what I say or do, she...