Ask General Kang: I just read a novel about a guy being turned into a monkey — is that possible?
on Nov 16, 2009 in Ask General Kang I hate to carp on this point, but was he turned into a monkey or was he turned into an ape of some kind? I seriously doubt it’s possible to turn a man into a monkey, unless you’re talking about what happens every time you invest in unsec...

Counterintuitive Fairy Tales: Doug’s Disaster
on Nov 13, 2009 in Monkeys! Skwibby fiction bus global warming gun nuts media hype swine flu terrorists Doug was freaked out. Global warming was going to melt his face (right after it killed all the polar bears and drowned the Maldives). It was a maxim that terrorists or free-roaming gun-nuts boarded his bus and either blew it up, or shot him with a se...

A short history of YouTube
on Nov 12, 2009 in But is it art? Monkeys! You can see it here, if the embedded player face-plants like the ninja. This is an ad for a Swedish ISP, and they are waaaaaaaay cooler than Rogers or Bell. Alltop and humor-blogs.com both think the squirrel is hot.

The Lost PowerPoint Slides (Battle of Vimy Ridge Edition)
on Nov 11, 2009 in Hinky History The Lost PowerPoints General Ludwig von Falkenhausen presents “The Week of Suffering” (circa April 2-9, 1917) –>slide 2 Artillery relentless I’d guess about a million shells Somehow can target our artillery, even though they’re hidden behin...

The Lost PowerPoint Slides (Henri Bergson Edition)
on Nov 10, 2009 in The Lost PowerPoints Time and Free Will (circa 1889) –>slide 99 human experience is a continuous flow not events in succession, as physics would have it time is experienced as duration so it can seem longer than it is like this lecture. Laughter (circa 1901) R...

The Lost Power Point Slides (Edgar Rice Burroughs Edition)
on Nov 9, 2009 in But is it art? The Lost PowerPoints edgar rice burroughs formulaic plots john carter of mars pellucidar tarzan Presentation of Oeuvre (slides one through five) A Princess of Mars (first book in John Carter of Mars series) Disaffected ne’er-do-well white man rescues savage and extremely naked princess Along the way, he learns her language, fights stran...

The worst toilet in Switzerland
on Nov 6, 2009 in But is it art? Monkeys! Having recently watched Trainspotting, I was struck by how funny (and then disgusting) the “worst toilet in Scotland” scene was. So, that toilet wins for nasty. I think we have to give the prize for frightening to this toilet hanging ov...

Ask General Kang: Do you enjoy daylight savings time?
on Nov 5, 2009 in Ask General Kang Monkeys! control time and space daylight savings time delusions fall back Yes, of course. There’s nothing I enjoy more than having to reset my body’s circadian rhythms because of your human delusion that you control things. Most of you can barely operate your own crude technologies properly (put up your hands...

The Button
on Nov 4, 2009 in But is it art? Monkeys! An interesting update on the controversial Milgram experiment, but instead of an authority figure, we have one million dollars. And instead of an actor pretending to be shocked, we have nameless, distant, hypothetical dead people: The Button –...

Webmonkee creates book trailer for Marvellous Hairy
on Nov 3, 2009 in But is it art? Monkeys! Skwibby fiction On the off-chance you didn’t catch this on my author’s page, you should check out the video Webmonkees created for Marvellous Hairy: Practical Applications of the Infinite Monkey Theorem: If the embedded link doesn’t work, you can find...