Ripping Yarns of a Bloke Generally Mucking About

Owner: scrumper

Listed in: Humor

Language: English

Tags: Comedy, Running, Fat, Health, Life

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Latest Blog Posts for Artful Dodger

  • The Voice of Sanity
    on Aug 6, 2009
    Upon returning from Japan recently, like you, I have only just come to terms with the death of Wacko Jacko (aka Michael Jackson) and now, like a hammer blow, we learn that members of his entourage secretly plotted against the singer’s closest confi...
  • Abundant Love
    on Apr 10, 2009
    "You big fat woman get your fat leg off of meYou feel so goodScare the hell out of meYou got a great big legGot a whoppin' thighYou big fat woman get your fat leg off of me"So wails bluesman -Homesick James-his tortured voice lilting from my car's ri...
  • My Woman from Tokyo
    on Feb 21, 2009 in Travel
    "Don't remember this in Rosetta Stone"Well fellow readers (or in the case of reader just shout "I am he" and raise your hand) I must apologise for the abscence of drivel lately. I've been in the land of the rising sun for the
  • Don't Mention the War
    on Dec 30, 2008 in zombie humor war film
    So this past weekend I took my 12 year old to see Valkyrie. She is fascinated by the dynamics of the Germans during WWII (message to myself - must talk to her about that). In this movie there is a noticeable shortage of the typical wicked Nazi High C...
  • Credit Crunch Hits Vultures!
    on Dec 24, 2008 in running
    Like storm troopers rampaging through the streets of 1938 Berlin, the nation runs for cover from the financial firestorm. Nothing it appears is immune from the withering recession that threatens to engulf us, not even it seems, the poor old vulture.R...
  • Dead Man Eating
    on Dec 16, 2008 in Fat
    Has the nation grown to fat to die? According to undertakers, the regular size of a coffin is no good for your average corpse, so they’ve been forced to build new supersize hi-fat extra fries caskets in which to shovel our bulging cadavers once we...
  • Slim Chance
    on Dec 10, 2008 in Fat
    An embarrassed Oprah Winfrey says she's "fallen off the wagon" of healthy living and is tipping (over) the scales at 200 pounds. She says she's gained 40 pounds since 2006, when she weighed 160. Winfrey's weight and height put her
  • The Long Weight
    on Dec 7, 2008 in Fat
    How can exercise or working out, or whatever you want to call it, be defined? Fake work. That’s what. A hundred years ago our great grandfathers didn’t need to exercise. Theirs was a manual world. Food was simple and basic. If they wanted to go s...
  • Pulling Mussels from a Shell
    on Nov 28, 2008 in Slightly off topic
    It is reported that George V on his deathbed in 1936 uttered the immortal line “Bugger Bognor” He was of course referring to the time he had recently spent at the seaside town of Bognor Regis in West Sussex, while convalescing from a charming lis...
  • A Trick of the Tail
    on Nov 21, 2008 in Spinning
    Is Tuesday the worse day of the week? Or is it another day? From my perspective I always feel good on Friday evenings and Saturdays. Sunday isn’t bad although I hated it as a kid in England it now occupies mid table in the okay league.Well it’s T...
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