Class Is In Session Blog Posts

  • Adventures in Child Support: Addendum
    on Jan 24, 2011
    With the whole "Class Is In Session" theme, the blog (or at least the full chapters) uses life experience in a humorous fashion to "teach" some sort or point. I'm toying with the idea of ending each chapter with a "teachable moment" to comment o...
  • Cut-throat Family Time
    on Jan 23, 2011
    All weekend long, my son has been roping my girlfriend into playing video games with him. Ordinarily, he would have been outside playing sports or riding his bike. However, it has been below freezing, so he has been cooped up in the house. Finally, o...
  • No Narrative Thread
    on Jan 16, 2011 in nap gym FitLinxx Walmart weight loss
    I hate naps. Naps are stupid. That is to say unplanned, accidental naps are stupid. They leave me feeling like a brown bear awakened in mid hibernation. I have about as much energy and sense of purpose as a NyQuil comatosed agnostic thrown unexpected...
  • How to Make a Chef Boyardee Pizza in 20 Easy StepsPreheat oven to 425 degrees Fahrenheit.Pour 2/3 cup water into mixing bowl. Use 1 cup measuring cup and just estimate 2/3 because finding the right measuring cup wastes too much time.Open bag of dry pizza dough mix and empty into mixing bowl. Do not...
  • Candy Canes and Breasts
    on Jan 7, 2011
    Two separate topics for today's post, sort of related in that they are kind of health topics:First, I just finished making two recovery discs - for future emergencies - for my laptop since I killed it in December, and my friend Dan bro...
  • Things I Ingested Today
    on Jan 6, 2011
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  • Falling off the Wagon
    on Jan 3, 2011 in gym Walmart weight loss
    For New Year's, I had thought about resolving not to make fun of people I see in public. I don't mean like forever since we all know that would be physically impossible for me. I mean for just like a week.However, in that respect, a trip to Walmart f...
  • Edible Reindeer Poo????
    on Dec 20, 2010
    Apparently, two senior VPs of Marketing were sitting around during a think tank session and getting stoned off their asses.  One of them must have said to the other, "Hey let's sell some Reindeer crap to kids for Christmas. I bet they will reall...
  • What Men Want
    on Dec 10, 2010
    Let's just preface these Poll Results by saying there will be few surprises. lol  Without further ado, the top things men want in a significant other are as follows:Honesty. I was happy to see that the men and the women both agreed on this numbe...
  • What Women Want
    on Dec 9, 2010 in what women want
    The results of my Facebook Poll are in. The top things women want in their significant others are as follows:Honesty. This was the top response by far!Employed/Hardworking/Good Provider. No shock there in this economy.Humor. Hey, anybody seen the nat...
  • Itsy Bitsy SpiderWhen Pandora Radio is blaring and I have already had three glasses of Mt. Dew, it is kind of hard not to dance in the shower. Nickelback and Santana lured me into a false sense of security, which set me up to be sucker punched by Lynyrd Skynyrd. Now...
  • Elf of Anarchy Revisited
    on Dec 1, 2010
    This started with Elf of Anarchy Part One and has now escalated.I am almost at a loss for words on this one. Any woman who would do this to her husband probably also burns ants with a magnifying glass. Or maybe it's not the wife. Maybe that...
  • It's Really, Really, Really Important, Daddy!
    on Nov 30, 2010
    Jiggle. Jiggle. Rattle. Rattle.  "Daddy, why is the bathroom door locked?""Connor, you are supposed to knock on the bathroom door before you try to come in.""Oh."Knock. Knock. Jiggle. Rattle. "Daddy, why is the bathroom door locked?""I'm using t...
  • The Goddess of the Wendy's Chocolate Frosty
    on Nov 23, 2010 in Corona cuervo fairy tale island frosty dream
    A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away I was a Mexican who used to drink Cuervo and sing Norteño songs to an old, beat up karaoke machine with my friends, Pablo and Tomás. Then I fell in lust and married the Goddess of the Wendy's Chocolate Fros...
  • Perspectives on Thankfulness
    on Nov 22, 2010 in Thanksgiving
    "Connor, are you excited about Thanksgiving? You get to go visit your mom and Nana.""Yeah, I guess so. I just wish they would serve fried chicken instead of turkey. I can throw down on some fried chicken. And what is Thanksgiving for anyway?""We...
  • Thou Shalt Not Google Thyself
    on Nov 22, 2010
    I have eaten of the tree of knowledge and made the following discoveries by googling myself:I have a hotness rating of 4.6, which at first pissed me off when I thought it was an attractiveness rating. Apparently, it is a measure of how close my forme...
  • When I'm old and gray...
    on Nov 21, 2010
    As payback for making him pose for pictures like this, do you think my son will one day:a)kick my ass and tell people I fall down a lotb)sell my house and put me in a nursing home with multiple regulation violationsc)replace my Alzheimer's meds with...
  • Physical Education (Part Four)
    on Nov 17, 2010 in gym humor weight loss locker room
    My first day back at the gym, I was really motivated. I was determined to kick it up to a level I had not even been at before I quit going. Like most instant gratification junkies, I wanted the weight off, and I wanted it off yesterday. I stretched o...
  • Chapel Hill MonologueOver the weekend, I took my son, who is 8, to Chapel Hill for his first ever in person Tarheel experience. We went to see a basketball game Friday night. Saturday I took him to a few of my old favorite places, such as The Forest Theatre pictured...
  • Caution: Coffee is Hot
    on Nov 12, 2010
    This is the back of the admissions building at the college, and these are two of my Creative Writing students. Hi, Adrian and Minuet!This perspective (click on the photo to enlarge it) does not completely show the fact that the three exhaust vents ab...
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